I Wanna Move

Whether it's move school or move town or move country, I don't care.


I just wanna move.

Sigh. This is bullcrap. Reality will not stop coming back to bite me in the ass. Trust me, this is not some 'love crises' mojo. This is serious painful shit. And I don't know who to talk to.

Mum's too busy. And she barely cares. As in, like, she's not the idol I used to look up to anymore. Now, she's too concentrated on work. And honestly, she's kinda neglecting us.

I know it sounds petty and selfish for me to say that of my MUM. But I just want the old her back.

I cannot consult my father. As y'all know, he's not exactly 'therapist' material. Plus, lately, he's also been getting extremely busy.

My siblings aren't here anymore. No sister. No brother.


And I cannot consult any of my friends.

I feel as if I'm falling.

Dropping into nothingness.

I know it sounds way too overdramatic but the walls that had protected me from enemy lines are dropping once more. I may have rebuilt them up more than a million times and they stand strongly but I think that it's time to move destination. Somewhere safer.


I know what you're thinking; "Dude. Even if you move, you'll get harassed. That's life!"

But my parents have been thinking about moving me to another school for awhile now, and since now I firmly agree, I think I should.

There's this school... Rumored- No, It's not a rumor, It's TRUE. Truth be told, there are a GAZILLION people in that school who are just like me.


But I'm afraid. I hate moving to a new school cause I'll be the 'new kid' all over again. I've been the new kid in Primary 5 when I moved to SRS, how will I know I won't be deprived of the same torture in that school?!

But you know what.


Fuck this.

Instead of running away, I'll fucking face this.


I'm gonna be famous soon. VERY soon. And until then, I shouldn't stress about school and shit. Because by next year, I won't even be IN a school. I'll be on stage singing my heart out to people who actually adore me.


Sigh. I know I sound plenty vain and you want to slap me for being so self-centered.


But I swear to god, I just want to change the world.

I've made an oath. And I'm sticking to it.


Forever.




-Kyle

Tell Me You're Joking

Bitch, I ain't got all day and if you plan on treating me like this until you make your decision then screw you. I'm out.


...


That was random. :D LOL. Don't worry. That has nothing to do with me. I was just in the mood to speak gangsta'... okay, now I feel lame. Haha.


Now, moving on. I didn't go to school again. :\ Suckishh ugh.


I got like, a mind-blowing headache. Oh wait. No. No no no. I gots a good brain. xD lolwtf.


Positivity works, but it's killing me. Hahaha. What happened to 'Do good stuff and get good stuff in return?' Does it really like, work? :p Cause. I dont know.


Have I done good stuff? I ain't think so.


Sadness.

I'm still caught up in my fairytale. I just can't bring myself to wake up.


Oh and for the record, just because I'm vain, doesn't mean I'm the only person I care about, it just means I'm not an asskit like other people to be letting myself down when I haven't even proved my best.


That's all... I guess. :)



So. Bye? Haha.



-Kylekylantamm

What. Up.

So, exams are officially over :)


Hey, you know, she's like, so happy with him. I'm not kidding. I read the texts. HEY. I'm only human. I know I promised not to but, I'm glad I did.


I knew they were dating like, a month ago. But after reading their texts, I finally realized how serious they were. I mean, I want a best friend like that. The problem is, the best friend I have now is sooooooo not my type. Both of them. While Mich.. Well, I like, asked her already.


Request Pending.


Sadness.


Yeah... So... I guess, I'm gonna give up on June. Cause. What's the point in having to chase after her when she's already caught by some other guy? They seem happy. They are happy together. So who am I to charge in and take that away? I'm disrupting them. What gives me the right?


So.


Apple.


or.


Lotus.



Lotus is just eye-candy. Yes, another new one. NO. I do not like her. I just think she's super-duper hot... and y'know... Eye-candy. ;)


But the thing is, it feels as if it's January all over again. As if the 9 months that came and go haven't even arrived yet. Apple brings back bad memories and honorable ones. It's amazing how one person... can you feel as if you're young again.


I know it sounds stupid.


And rather, immature. But like,


Come on. I'm 12. Not even 13 yet. Cut me some slack.


I need to be dramatic. If not, my life is over.


HAHA. I'm like, so lame. Hormones. Blame it on the hormones ;)


Anyway. That's it, I guess. Umm... Yeah. Haha.


I hate being single. Reading those texts... It reminded me TOO much of E-- Um... a girl I used to date. I miss her. If we're not together, I at least wanna be her friend. But I'm afraid. God. I miss her so much.




Too much.

Greyson. Chance.

So like, I'm suddenly a fan of Greyson Chance/ Which is scary cause I've never had a MALE celebrity crush before. HAHA. Awkwardddd.





Whuuuuuuut? HAHAHA.


OMFG HE'S COMING TO KOTA KINABALU LIKE, THIS NOVEMBER. FUCKFUCKFUCK I WANNA WATCH HIM >:(


HEHEHE IMMA GET THOSE TICKETS.


EPICNESSSSSSS.


LIKE WHUUUT.

... YEAH OKAY.



BYE!



GREYSON WOOT

Unfriend You

So it's over yeah we're through, so I'm a unfriend you
You're the best liar ever knew, so I'll unfriend you
Cause I should have known, right from the start
I'm deleting you right from my heart
Yeah it's over, my last move is to unfriend you

You come on to everybody
Everybody all the time
You give up to anybody
What I thought was only mine

So it's over yeah we're through, so I'm a unfriend you
You're the best I ever knew, so I'm a unfriend you
'Cause I should have known, right from the start
That you didn't have a human heart
Yeah it's over my last move is to unfriend you
Unfriend you

So, What would make me happier?

A Game of Mafia 2 on my friend's Xbox 360?

Or like,

A fucking break.


... I think the Mafia thing.


I don't know. Nowadays things have been very fucked up for me. But then again, it wasn't as fucked up as last year.

Most Painful Year : 2010

Most Depressing Year : 2011


And they both win by a landslide! God. I wish I can just go back to being a kid. Back then, drama didnt even exist in my vocabulary. I remember either wanting to be a teacher or a horse-riding coach. Either one. I was happy. Satisfied. In Peace.

All of a sudden, time had to catch up.

And now I'm at a race with world's greatest enemy.


My Own Age.


If I stop, I'll just relive my years over and over again and even I don't want that to happen. But If I keep going, I'll be sucked into a world of drama and adulthood and I ain't ready for that!


I wanna stay young.

And stay young forever.


Okay fine, not really.

In my mind, it's better to live life fully then leave with satisfaction.


If you live forever then... what's the point in doing all the adventures? You know you won't die. You know you're not satisfied. You'll just roam the Earth all... sad.



Yeah. I'm weird like that. :\


But get this.


I'm like, so confident in my Exams. Though they're SHIT ASS hard. I'm like, positive that they'll be like... high scores and shit. HAHA. Positivity ;)

Besides', I've been studying! :D

I know. Dramatic Gasp.


OH well :)


Besides that, um, what else have been going on? Haha.

Can't really remember. :p


Nothing much, to be honest. Besides the usual confused feelings onto someone else (Will not mention names) I am fairly neutral.


Yeaaaah. That's basically it. HAHA :)



ONE. MORE. FUCKING. DAY. TILL. FREEDOM.




EXAMS. END ALREADY!



p/s tomorrow's Science. SHIT.


oh well. it's Art too. <3




-Kyle

OH MY

OH. OH. OH. OH.

BABY BABY BABY OHHHHHHHHH. LIKE,

BABY BABY BABY NOOOOOOOOO. LIKE,

BABY BABY BABY OHHHHHHHHH.

I THOUGHT YOU'D ALWAYS BE MINE. MINE.

HI THERE :)

So...

To Shereen,

if you're wondering.

Which I know you are.

It is... DUN DUN DUNNNNNNNNNNNNN.

APPLE.